sebenarnya dah lama liya nak post pasal kematian ni tapi tak sempat2.. so actually ni adalah observation liya masa liya buat forensic posting kat serdang hospital.. bila sebut pasal forensic mesti ngeri kan.. tapi bila ada experience duduk  dalam bilik autopsi tu  dan assist pulak doctor buat autopsi, taklah sengeri yang dibayangkan. for me forensic posting is one of the best posting in medical course because it is a very good exposure and also can give kesedaran yang besar..

masa liya kat jabatan forensic tu, kitorang satu group berpeluang tgk autopsi 3 case sudden death, 1 death due to motor vehicle accident and another one baby meniggal sbb suffocation tertutup selimut.. bile tgk case sudden death tu jadi mcm insaf dan ingat sgt tentang kematian.. sbb org yg mati tu dijumpai kat tepi jalan.. kat tepi longkang kat umah.. collapse kat dalam pub.. so mcm2 tempat and dia berlaku secara tiba2 and selalunya takde orang sedar..

cube kita bayangkan, kita elok2 bgn pagi, then tibe2 tgh jalan jatuh kat tiba jalan, dapat cardiac arrest and die immediately, tak sempat nak resuscitate pun.. pastu pagi tu pulak tak solat subuh.. nauzubillah.. jgnlah terjadi mcm tu kat kita..  satu lagi contoh kita boleh mati tiba2 sebab accident.. sbb org kata malang tidak berbau kan.. pastu meninggal di tempat kejadian..

so, cuba kita renung kembali ayat Allah, surah Ali imran ayat 185,

“Tiap-tiap yang bernyawa akan merasai mati, dan bahawasanya pada hari kiamat sahajalah akan disempurnakan balasan kamu. Ketika itu sesiapa yang dijauhkan dari neraka dan dimasukkan ke syurga maka sesungguhnya ia telah berjaya. Dan (ingatlah bahawa) kehidupan di dunia ini (meliputi segala kemewahannya dan pangkat kebesarannya) tidak lain hanyalah kesenangan bagi orang-orang yang terpedaya.”

setiap manusia pasti akan mati cuma kita tak tau bagaimana dan bila kita akan mati.. dan kita akan selalu rasa kita tak cukup bersedia untuk mati.. kita hanya boleh berdoa dan meminta kepada Allahh agar kita diberi husnul khatimah.. meninggal dgn iman, dalam keadaan yang baik dan tidak mengaibkan.. aminn.   

on my first day of orthopaedic posting, the head of dept asked us to write an essay title.. Aspiration to be a doctor.. i just hand in my essay today..

Aspiration to be a doctor.

The profession as a doctor is seen as a noble and highly praised job. When we recall our primary school memory, we will notice that most of the children, when they were asked about what they want to be in the future, almost half of them will say doctors. Others might opt for other admired professions such as teacher or lecturer. Some might want to be a fireman or a policeman because they pictured these jobs as adventurous and they can help people who are in danger. As for my childhood memory, I always dream to be a doctor or a teacher, but more to doctor because my immature brain at that time have the understanding that a doctor will help people and when we are sick, we will see the doctor and we will be cured. I was persistent with this ambition until Standard 6.

When I enrolled in secondary school, I fell in love with Chemistry because I had a bad experience with this particular subject. I failed the first test in Chemistry during my Form 4, and that was the only paper that I ever failed in my entire educational period up to now. I was really frustrated and I studied hard for Chemistry until I decided to become a chemical engineer.

The turning point of my love to Chemistry was when the SPM results were announced. Alhamdulillah I got straight A’s, and at that time I suddenly thought of becoming a doctor. I do not know how and why such idea came. As far as I could remember, I had two reasons for that. The first one was because I obtained good results and I noticed that it was difficult to enrol in a medical school unless you result is “power”. The other reason was because none of my family member is a doctor, so I thought again, why not I become one. My parents had no influence on my decision and they gave full support to me when I decided to choose medical course. That moment, I do not have any idea how difficult life is to be a medical student and even worse during houseman ship.

When I step my foot in IIUM, The Garden of Knowledge and Virtue, then only I started to ponder on the reasons for me becoming a doctor. At that time, I was very inspired by the talk given during the taaruf week by one of our lecturer. He mentioned that the role of doctors are not limited to hospital or treating patient only, but we also play role in a society as they trust doctors and respect us. Doctors should have a good quality in skills and also attitude in order to be a good example to the society. Moreover, we are Muslims and by being a good doctor, we are portraying the good teachings of Islam and become an exemplary by the people we are dealing with everyday.

I also observed that the lecturers in IIUM have many good qualities. They are not only doctors, teachers but also a mentor who I can always take example from them and applied it to life as a step for me to achieve my dream.

Therefore, I had decided that I want to become a competent and safe doctor and I will try as much as possible to give benefits to others based on the knowledge that I have, especially to the betterment of the ummah and also for the glory of Islam. Insya Allah.